Paranoid Delusion
by MalllladeImaginaire
Summary: Jennyanydots gets it into her head that Skimbleshanks is cheating on her and decides she has to do something about it. My second entry for Magical-Marvel-Mr.Mistoffelees' "We are NOT cliche!" challenge! xx
1. Chapter 1

**Pairing: Jennyanydots / Skimbleshanks**

**Cliché theme: "You're flirting with everyone, so I'm going to make you jealous!"**

* * *

How could he! How long have we been mates for now? Years! And how many times have I flirted with other toms? None! (That may be because I'm truly awful at flirting, but that's not the point! Even if I wasn't terrible at it I wouldn't do that to him.)

Any relationship is supposed to be based on mutual respect and love and... a couple of other things, but they're probably not that important. Anyway, he's clearly lacking any kind of respect for me. All he ever does is go swanning off on his stupid train, pretending to be all important and busy and meeting all sorts of exciting, exotic queens while I'm stuck at home cooking and cleaning and doing housework. I mean, it's just not _fair_. He never appreciates me or says thank you or anything! In fact, he probably spends half his time laughing at me behind my back with all his little queenfriends. How do you think that makes me feel?

And we have a daughter together. Think of what kind of an example he's setting for her. It's not like Rumpleteazer isn't bad enough already without her father running around flirting with every other queen in sight. Well, maybe that's a little unfair. It's not _every _queen, in fact I haven't actually _seen _him flirting with anyone as such, but I know he is! I can tell!

That's the problem. If I try and talk to him about it he gets all like: "I'd never do that to you. Where did you get that idea? I've never flirted with anyone. Stop being silly" and I have absolutely no proof! How can I make him stop doing something I can't prove he's doing in the first place? It makes my head ache thinking about it.

But I have to think about it. I can't stop myself. It's been getting worse and worse lately. The other day he got back with cream round his mouth and guiltily wiped it away when I mentioned it, but refused to tell me why he'd been eating cream when he was supposed to be working. And the day before that he had a new watch on a shiny new chain. I didn't ask him about it (I don't want to look completely paranoid!) but when I hinted to him about where he'd got it, he wouldn't talk about it. Where could he have got it from if it wasn't given to him by some other queen, I'd like to know! And that's not all! A few weeks ago, when he got back I had cooked a beautiful dinner for him and he claimed not to be hungry and went straight to bed. It does make you wonder why he was so tired and why he wasn't hungry. Clearly he'd already eaten with someone else... And those are just a few of the incidents. I haven't even mentioned all the times he's got home late from work. He always claims the train was delayed but I don't believe him. As if Skimble would let his train be late!

I have to _do _something! I can't just lose him, just let some stupid, ugly... Sorry, that's not very nice. It just makes me so angry, though! What I was trying to say was I can't just let someone else steal him away from me. After all we've been through together! I can't! I love him too much and I don't think I could live without him, I really don't.

But what can I do? I've tried talking to people and asking their advice. It doesn't work. I was knitting with Jellylorum the other day and casually asked her what she would do if she thought Asparagus was cheating on her and she just said that she knew he'd never do that. I mean, honestly! Why is that even vaguely helpful? And I asked Rumpleteazer but she just thought I'd seen Mungojerrie cheating on her and got into a complete state about it. All that conversation resulted in was the two of them not speaking for days and me owing her a rather awkward apology and explanation. That's the last time I try and ask her about anything serious. Although in hindsight, it probably wasn't the best idea to start with.

There's only one solution as far as I can see (And that's all I've got to go on, seeing as how all my friends are singularly unhelpful!). I'll have to confront him about it. I know I've tried before and it hasn't worked but this time it'll be different. This time I'll have proof and the only way of getting that is to follow him. I know it's probably a stupid idea but my mind's made up. Anything it takes to keep him with me. If this is what it takes, then so be it!

Now I just have to figure out the practical details. He usually leaves for work around 11 o'clock, his train leaves at precisely 11.40. So, I have to get there early enough to not miss the train but late enough so that Skimble is busy doing other things and doesn't see me. Actually, while I'm on the subject of not being seen, a disguise might not be a bad idea. I'm sure Jellylorum's kittens still have some dressing up things left over from last Halloween, maybe I could ask to borrow them. I'm sure detectives in novels always wear a disguise so it must be helpful. I should definitely try that.

Anyway, back to the timing. I have to wave him off at eleven, it takes about twenty minutes to get there and the train leaves at twenty to twelve. So if I set off from here at... quarter past eleven, I should be on time.

Perfect. That's settled then. I'll get the proof I need to confront him, then I'll make him see sense and things can go back to the way they always were.

Unless... Is confronting him really the best idea? He might pretend to agree with me but carry on flirting with other queens behind my back anyway. If I just talk to him about it, he won't understand how I feel. I have to show him what it feels like to know the person you love is flirting with other people and cheating on you. Why would he stop if he didn't realise how awful he was making me feel? But how do I show him? I can't think...

Oh no, he's home. I'll figure out what I'm going to do tomorrow on my way to the station. I don't have time to think about it now. I'd better go and get the dinner ready...


	2. Chapter 2

Ok, so maybe a disguise was not the best idea I've ever had. Currently it's seventeen minutes past eleven, so I'm late and should have set off two minutes ago and I have a bit of a problem. My genius disguise was supposed to consist of a large sun hat with a big floppy brim and some hair dye so my fur looked a different colour. I was pretty sure that'd fool him. If my face was obscured by the hat and my fur was a totally different colour, I figured it wouldn't even occur to him to suspect it was me. I mean, he is expecting me to be sat at home cleaning after all.

I made sure to tell him last night all about the chores I'd have to do today and then stayed up all night doing them, so when he gets home it'll look like I've been really busy.

But back to my little... erm... problem. When I say little, it's not really that little. It's quite a large problem actually, you see I chose a rather inconspicuous shade of brown hair dye thinking I'd just blend into the crowd and he wouldn't even look twice at me. Well, as it turns out human hair dye does not react well with my fur-type. It didn't come out quite the right colour. When I say not quite the right colour, what I mean is... I'VE GONE BRIGHT ORANGE! I could stop traffic or signal planes with this fur colour. Trust me, the last thing I'm going to be doing is blending into the crowd. You practically have to wear sunglasses to look at me! I'm verging on neon!

Not the best start to my 'secretly-follow-Skimble-and-find-out-if-he-is-in-fact-actually-cheating-on-me' campaign, but what can I do? I'm late already and if I don't hurry I'll miss the train. I've already spent ten minutes trying to scrub the damn stuff out my fur but it won't even fade! I'm still as luminous as ever. And how on earth will I explain this to Skimble this evening? Yes, I can just picture that conversation: "So how was your day, love?" "Oh, brilliant, yours?" "Good, good. Very busy. The usual." "Just out of interest, why are you bright orange?" And then what do I say? I can hardly answer "I was trying to spy on you in secret and thought it'd be a great idea to dye my fur as a disguise" now can I? Like that won't be an awkward conversation. I'm already looking forward to it.

Oh smashing, and now I've set off without my hat. This just gets better and better. No time to go back for it now, I suppose. I'll just have to make do without it. It can't be that bad. In fact, I'm _sure _the hat was a bad idea anyway. Yes, I'm _positive_. It would have been far too conspicuous.

How far is it to the station? Am I definitely going the right way? This is taking forever! I've barely left the Junkyard and I'm already exhausted. How does he do it? Maybe I should have planned in more time to get there... No, I'm sure it'll be fine. I'll just hurry up a bit, that's all.

I feel a bit bad about leaving my cockroaches unattended, though. They'll probably revert to their old ways and start terrorizing people again. And what about the mice? Who will cook their meals for them if I'm not there, I'd like to know?! But it can't be helped. They'll just have to get along without me for a day. They'll be alright. Of course they will. Why wouldn't they be? It's not like everything depends on me being there... They'll be ok.

Gosh, I'm tired. My legs feel like lead and I'm pretty sure I've gone an unattractive shade of red. I'm probably covered in sweat. How on earth does Skimble do _this _every day? Can't... breathe... need... break...

Ok, that's better. So technically I didn't exactly buy a ticket, but the prices are for _humans_. I don't see why I should have to pay as much to catch a bus as a human. I mean, I don't take up nearly as much space, I don't need my own seat, I don't listen to loud music and annoy the other passengers, I don't put my feet on the seat in font, I don't chew gum noisily with my mouth open, I don't... Oh, this is my stop. Better get out quickly before the doors close...

But now which way? There must be hundreds of trains here. How on earth an I supposed to find the right one? They all look the same to me and I can't see Skimble anywhere. This trip is turning out to be a really, really bad idea. I'm probably going to miss the stupid train anyway, stood here on the platform trying to work out which one to catch. Maybe I should just pick one... That one's a rather pretty shade of red, but the black one over there is the shiniest and I know Skimble takes pride in his train looking best, but that green one has the most comfortable looking seats... Oh, my head! Which one, which one?

Hang on, is that Skimbleshanks over there? It is! I've found him! I _knew _all along it was the blue train, I just knew it! I'd better hurry and catch him up. Don't want to be late.

Oh, so it's not the blue one, it's the silver one. Well, I knew that. There was no way it was going to be that horrible, scruffy, ugly, old blue train. Who would have thought it, even for a moment? Ridiculous! As if my Skimbleshanks would let his train look like _that_. I ask you!

Help! He looked round. What if he saw me?! What do I do? He's sure to have noticed me, my fur does stick out a mile, and I bet he recognized me. Oh no, oh no, oh no. What now? He's bound to

come over and confront me! What do I say? I did jump behind that woman's suitcase but I'm pretty sure he must have seen me.

I'd better get on the train or it'll go without me. Skimble seems to have got on so maybe he didn't see me after all. I hope. Ah, that man is getting on and holding the door open for a woman with a pram. I'll sneak in past them before the door closes. They're so busy with the baby they won't even notice me. Why humans make such a fuss about babies is a mystery to me. They're not even cute! Take kittens, for example. They are adorable little things and learn and grow a lot faster than human babies. Kitten are already bounding around, playing and exploring at ten weeks old and what are human babies doing? Lying around gurgling, eating and sleeping. I mean, honestly. I really don't see what all the fuss is about. Hang on, where was I? Oh, yes. Getting on the train.

That bit wasn't to hard. Now I just need to find somewhere nice and comfortable to sit, preferably where Skimble can't see me but I can watch him. Ah, that suitcase looks like a good place. It's in the rack near the window so I can look out but there are other cases in front of it so I'd be half hidden from view. Perfect. And there's even a coat on it. A fur coat. How lovely. Maybe I'll just settle down for a bit of a rest, I mean, the train's not actually moving yet after all and I am quite tired after all that walking. In fact, I might just lie down and close my eyes for a bit. Just for a second, just until the train starts moving.


	3. Chapter 3

Ouch! What was that?! Where am I? What's going on? Why...? Oh yes, I remember. I'm on Skimble's train to spy on him. That was it. I must have dropped off for a minute. How silly of me. Not exactly the perfect sleuth, am I? I wonder how long I was asleep for.

Wait a second, aren't we going the wrong way? How come... No... It can't be. We're not... we can't possibly be on the way back to London. We just can't! I was only asleep for a second, I...

What do I do now? I've come all this way for nothing! Not only have I been asleep the whole time and not managed to gather any evidence, now I also have to try and race Skimble to get home. He'll be expecting me to be there, after all. What do I do? I don't even know where I am or what's happening. Maybe next time we stop I can look out and spot a sign with the name of the station. That seems like a relatively good idea. Can't be that hard. I'll just have to make sure Skimble is nowhere nearby or he might spot me looking out.

Why, oh why, did I ever think this was a good idea?!

Ah, we seem to have stopped. Carefully does it... If I just rest my paws on this suitcase and push myself up I might just be able to see out. Gently! That bag in front seems to be slipping. I don't want to cause a bag-slide, that'd be sure to draw attention to me. That's exactly the sort of thing my Skimble would notice and feel it his duty to sort out and I don't want him finding me here, now, do I?

That's better. I can just about see out. And there's a station sign. Perfect!

What does it say, though? It's quite gloomy and I can't really make it out. Cov...? Cove...? I really should have brought my glasses! I can't read it in the dark from this distance. Maybe I could ask on of the other passengers. No, on second thoughts that's a bad idea. A neon orange cat is bound to attract unwanted attention. I'll just have to try and figure it out by myself. Now what could that possibly say? Think, Jenny. Skimble had told you all the stations on his route, just try and remember one beginning with 'Cove'. Cove... Cove...Cove... Aha! Got it! It's Coventry, we must be in Coventry!

But that's almost back in London! I've slept all the way there and most of the way back! And I still haven't seen any sign of Skimble anywhere. I'm a hopeless detective. Why can I never succeed at anything?!

There he is! He's just walking past my window! I don't see anyone with him, maybe he's just... Wait! There! Standing by the station building. There's another cat. And she's definitely a queen. He's going over to talk to her, I'm sure.

Yes, I was right. Look at them talking and laughing together. And the way she's leaning on his arm. It's disgusting. That stupid, cheap, tacky queen is just plain nauseating! Look at her horrible, sleek, shiny black fur with the neat little white speckles. What sort of a stupid coat colour is that? I ask you! And that revolting shade of blue for her eyes. And that new, sparkling red collar, that really brings out the colour of her eyes. I bet she put that on specially to try and impress my Skimbleshanks. How dare she! Jumped-up little pollicle! And she clearly thinks she's good-looking, the way she's smoothing her fur all the time and that nasty, smug little smile. It makes me sick. The way she seems so confident and full of herself, like she knows she's managed to steal Skimble off me! 

Wait a minute, what if she does? What if he told her about me? They're probably laughing about me right now behind my back! _Oh, isn't it funny stupid, ugly Jenny sat at home cooking and cleaning for me and looking forward to me getting back. She has no idea. Ha ha ha._

Or worse, what if they pity me? What if they feel sorry for me for not being as pretty as her or for being fatter than her and older than she is? They might even feel sorry for me for being so devoted to Skimble and blind to what he's doing. That would be even worse. I'm not sure I could cope with that.

Ouch! What was that? Oh, the train has started moving again. Typical, now because of that suitcase slipping on me I didn't see them saying goodbye to each other. What if he kissed her? I'm sure he did. Before the train set off I definitely saw her leaning towards him. I'm sure of it.

How could he? What have I ever done to deserve that? I've always been loyal and faithful to him! He knows I have! And I adore him! Skimble and Rumpleteazer mean everything to me! Why would he do that to me?

And Rumpleteazer? Didn't he ever once think about how it would make her _feel _if her parents split up? That can traumatise young cats for life! What if she doesn't want to start a family in case the same thing happens to her? She might never want to have kittens, now! And I so wanted grandchildren!

But then again, it's not like Mungojerrie is exactly what I'd call 'parent material'. Maybe it's for the best if she doesn't want kittens for a while. I'm sure she'd get over us splitting up eventually and maybe she'd come to her senses about him. Then she could settle down with some nice, respectable tom and start a family of her own.

Not with that ghastly Mungojerrie! He's never been good enough for my little angel. And he just isn't trustworthy. If Skimble could do this to me, I'm sure Mungojerrie would have no qualms about cheating on my little Teazer. He's not really a nice sort of tom, in fact, some of the things he does are downright wicked! Working for Macavity and stealing things all the time... And that dreadful accent. He's such a bad influence on Rumpleteazer! I will never understand what she could possibly see in him! But then again, I'm sure it's just a phase. Young queens do go through phases of rebelling against their parents. That's all this is, she'll see sense in the end.

But that's not the point. I was thinking about Skimbleshanks. I can't let myself get distracted. I've got to keep an eye on him.

Ah, I see him. He's over there drinking a cup of tea. What's that he's putting in it? Scotch?! It can't be! He promised me he never touched alcohol, he _promised_! Well, I suppose that's just another thing he's lied about. But then again, if he doesn't want to be with me anyway, why should I care what he drinks?

No, Jenny, stop thinking like that! Of course I care. That's why I'm doing this after all. I want to work things out with him. I've _got _to! I don't think I could live without him. So what I really need to do is pull myself together and think of a plan!

A plan... a plan... That is definitely easier said than done. Maybe go over things a step at a time.

Talking to him about it is out. I've tried it before and now I have proof that all he did on those occasions was lie to me. That would be pointless.

I suppose I could confront him with what I know but then he'd still most likely deny it. Try and pretend she was just a friend or something. Or he might always get angry. You know, be annoyed that I'd been spying on him and storm out on me. I could lose him by accident! I can't do that. No need to make _her _job any easier than it already is! That would just be playing right into _her_ paws and giving him an actual reason to leave me. I don't want him to just tell everyone he had to go because I was so clingy and paranoid. No, I need a better plan than that.

What if I tried to make him jealous? I could make him see that I'm very popular with the toms and he's lucky to have me. Make him think _he's _going to lose _me._ See how he reacts to that. Maybe the threat of losing me will bring him to his senses.

Actually, that's a brilliant idea. All I'd have to do is flirt with a couple of the other toms in the Junkyard, make it look like they're interested in me and make sure he sees us. Arrange a couple of dates or something and be sure to tell Skimble I won't be at home, I'll be out with another tom. Force him to see that he can't just take me for granted, that I won't just sit at home and do his washing and cleaning for him, that I, too, have a life and that if he doesn't want me there are plenty of other toms who do! It's a perfect plan!

Ok, there is one tiny drawback. I've never flirted with anyone before. Not _really_. Only once and I was terrible at it. But you never know, maybe I was just nervous that time and they do say practice makes perfect. And after all, needs must. If I want to keep Skimble I'll have to do this. I can't fail!

Oh dear, we're nearly home. The train's pulling up and everyone's getting off. I managed to think up my plan just in time then! Better be careful that he doesn't spot me, not now I've managed to get this far. I'll just get off with that family, I can hide behind then. He's looking the other way anyway.

That wasn't too hard, after all. Now how on earth do I get home before him?


End file.
